Saturday, September 8, 2012


I met him on Grindr - not the best place to meet guys - got his number and we started messaging. After a few days we decided to meet up. I was so scared yet excited to meet him in person. He has a roommate so he waited for his roommate to go out and eat dinner before he picked me up at the post office and took me to his apartment. His 'one bedroom' apartment is on the 3rd floor. He has a roommate and his apartment has only one bedroom so I figured out that his roommate is not just a 'roommate'. 

We had sex for the first time. No penetration yet, just oral sex. It was quick but its awesome. After we had sex we cuddled a bit and started to have a conversation. I really don't know what to say to him at that time. I really enjoyed the sex, but the conversation was unexpected. It was a short but really sweet conversation. And then he need to bring me home because his roommate will arrive anytime soon so he brought me back home.

We still continue chatting and messaging after that. I started asking him questions about his roommate. At first he told me that roommate is a 'friend' of his (B*llsh*t! I don't buy that. LOL!). They've know each other for almost a year now. His roommate is an Asian college student and he was there for summer vacation from school. I found out that his roommate will be leaving the week after we first met because his classes will start soon. I was ecstatic at that time knowing that his roommate will be leaving soon. It gave me hope that I may be able to see him again.

But there's still one more thing that bothers me - are they just really 'friends'? One time we chatted, I confronted him and told him I can feel that they're more than friends and he confirmed to me that he like his roommate more than a friend. I don't know why I felt sad and somehow started to lose my home on meeting him again. It's was just sex but why did it made me feel that way towards him?

I message him every time I have a free time. Finally my phone started to have sense and become a little useful. I only have a handful of contacts on my phone. My phone is being used more for data than messaging nor calling. He replies to my messages most of the time if he's not that busy too. Waiting for his reply excites me. Finally I've met someone who apparently knows how to hit the reply button.

As I get to know him more, I found out that he's a military guy and he will also be leaving soon because he'll be assigned on a different base. I felt really sad to hear that. I almost lose hope of seeing him again. But then again, he won't be leaving 'til after my birthday. We still have more than 5 weeks left. There's still hope.

I started reflecting with myself. Do I like him? Yes, I like him a lot. Why? I don't know. I just do. What now? I guess we'll be better off as friends. When I first met him I felt that I can be myself when I'm with him. And so our seed of friendship started to grow a sprout.

When his roommate left, we started to hangout more often and meet at least once or twice a week. I got a chance to know him better. He's a very sweet guy. He has a good sense of humor. He's a bit of a bully and likes teasing me a lot. He's caring and understanding. He is a good listener. His house not perfectly clean but most of his stuff are in order. Did I mention how great he is in bed? LOL!

I opened up to him, told him some of my dark past and deepest secrets. He also did the same to me and started to open up. I started to like him more as I get to know him more. I just let myself like him. I can feel that he's starting to like me too, but I know and I can feel that he doesn't like me the same way he likes his roommate. I don't want to ruin their relationship but he's definitely for keeps so I said to myself that we can definitely be good friends.

Right now I consider him as one of my best friends. He'll be leaving soon but this is definitely not a goodbye. I still hope that our paths will cross each other again. I'm going out with him tomorrow on a 'friendly' date. He'll be bringing me somewhere I don't know yet for my birthday. I'm excited. Its the first time (and I hope not the last time) that I'll be going out with him. 

People may come and go but just because they left doesn't mean that they'll be gone forever.

Thank you for everything my friend. xoxo

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